It was after having Lourdes — or Lola, as she’s called by those closest to her – that Madonna realised her fame and fortune had made her unhappy. ‘What was wonderful about the money was that I could put a roof over my head and food in my stomach, but after that it just becomes unnecessary.
‘Then you begin to realise there are whole areas of your life where you are not happy. I was definitely lonely ten and 15 years ago,’ she admits. ‘There were whole chunks of my life where I was so lonely, and periods when I felt I didn’t have a friend in the world and wondered if it was ever going to be possible for me so have a relationship that was going so last. I did wonder if it was ever going to be possible to find a man who could handle me as well as a man I could handle. But then just when I wasn’t looking I found one.’
She accepts there has been endless speculation about the state of her marriage, even acknowledging the tumours that her obsession with Kabbalah,almost ended their relationship. ‘Oh please,’ she says. ‘People always want to say negative things about us. If it isn’t one thing then it could be another, but Kabbalah has been an ingredient in making our relationship this successful. I don’t force Guy to do anything. I couldn’t. Kabbalah is something we do together; we study together, we read books. It is a point of interest for us. You could say it’s a hobby we have in common and anything that makes you more aware of your behaviour – something that makes you stop and think and take responsibility for yourself – is going to make you and your relationship stronger.’
Madonna laughs again. ‘When I first met Guy. I couldn’t believe I had met someone as strong
willed as I was. But now I have accepted it and it is a major ingredient in the success of our relationship. Guy has a very forceful personality with very specific likes and dislikes. He doesn’t back down one iota if it’s something we disagree on but I respect that. I’ve definitely had an influence on him and he’s come around to looking in some things from my point of view but I could never say he was a pushover.’ Family life means everything to Madonna, whose own mother died from cancer when she was just five. She confesses that her and her children’s favourite way to kick back and enjoy themselves is to spend an hour or so dancing like lunatics together, inventing ridiculous disco routines and falling about laughing on the sofas. ‘Every day I make sure I have time just to be with my children,’ she says.
The very idea of Madonna cavorting in such a way seems completely bizarre but her public
persona is a million miles away fmm who she is at home. ‘I don’t value diamonds. I rarely wear jewellery. I’m perfectly happy to muck around in a pair of pants and wellies,’ she reveals. ‘Sometimes my daughter gets angry because I go to school with her, wearing my tracksuit and she says, “Please can’t you just wear normal clothes?” I think she wants me to be a Yummy Mummy but that’s not me.’
Guy also has his own views on his wife’s fashion. ‘He will sometimes laugh at what I wear, I’ll put something on and he’ll look at me and say, “Who are you going as. then?”‘
Madonna admits one of her greatest fears is that her children grow up to he spoiled brats. ‘That is not going to happen if I have anything to do with tt,’ she says. ‘Guy and I like to keep things simple. People are so generous and want to give the children presents but we don’t want them showered with gifts. We teach them value, and they know how lucky they are and they know how much they should appreciate things. But it is very difficult and it is something I do really worry about.’ The children are, naturally, fans of her books. ‘They love them,’ she says, proudly. ‘We read them together,’ Lotsa De Carsha is dedicated to just one person: Guy. ‘To my husband who gives me lotsa everything,’ reads the inscription. She grins when asked about it. ‘What can I say? The greatest thing he gives me is inspiration,’
And, clearly, true happiness.
© Grazia Magazine